“Not having people you can really trust leaves you with that vulnerable feeling of being in a field surrounded by wolves.”
My sister said this while we were talking recently about the quality of love and relationships in life compared to quantity. As we mature, our view of and relationship with our relationships change. We gain a better understanding of the love and energy we want and need around us. We hopefully learn the difference between expectations and standards, and place our focus on the latter. With the circumstances of adulthood, we see how much effort our relationships require in order to be maintained and continue to grow. And, with all this considered, we are able to clearly see our relationships where they are. We also see how precious and rare the truly full relationships in our lives are. In a society where abundant effort isn’t necessarily required to technically connect with people, we can sometimes lose sight of the work necessary to achieve full connection in our relationships. And that, coupled with our own obstacles, can make healthy relationships sometimes difficult to achieve and come by. Which can leave us feeling vulnerable and alone. Which is why it’s vital to know and set our standards, work for, and be good to the relationships in our lives where love lies. Not every relationship we have will last the course of our lives. Some will find us where we least expect them, during a time we need them most. Some we will grow up in and grow out of. Some will be established by blood yet feel lifeless. Some will span seemingly infinite time and space. Some will keep us laughing even when we don’t want to. Some will take us on our greatest of adventures. Some will teach us the biggest lessons of our lives. Whatever the conditions of our relationships, may we treasure and nurture the love and friendship in them. May we build and rest them on a foundation of honesty, accountability, presence, reliability, respect, and appreciation. May we not get solely caught up in obtaining relationships, but in actually preserving our relationships of value. I say, even if I have only one true person by my side in a field of wolves, I’d rather that than a crowd of people whom I’m not sure are there for me or the wolves themselves.
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