For quite some time I have known that one of my greatest hurdles in my work is vulnerability. In my life, I, without thinking, take disappointment, pain, and adversity in stride. Hardly taking the time to feel, let alone process my feelings. This has no doubt gotten in the way of my work, causing me to forever seek out and cling to any and all strength in my characters. But, in this, I know that I have blocked some of my characters' opportunities to feel and allow their vulnerabilities freedom to lead. I say all this to say we are forever tested, and challenged to grow. I have been noticing circumstances being bestowed upon me that are beyond my ability to control, forcing me to have only my feelings to face. And, as difficult as it might be, I see the blessing in it. For in this blessing, I will be more at peace. In this blessing, I will be stronger. In this blessing, I will evolve within my art.
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Out of all my years thus far, 14 years at this point, loving and partaking in this craft and art form, I do not feel I have pursued my work as I would fully like to. My technique remains to be delved into fully. More preparation remains to be made. And, I plan to tap into it all, at least all I have right now, with this opportunity. Elizabeth Bennet, and any other character, deserves the work. And, that is what I plan to offer. My take on Lizzie shall be thorough. It shall be mine. It shall be organic. I am excited. I am thankful.
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January 2021
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